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My 5 Daily Practices for Making it a Great Day
Everywhere I go, people notice and comment on the fact that I’m an upbeat person. And they’re right. I feel good and positive almost all the time. Really.
Sure, I have moments of setback and overwhelm just like everyone else, but what I’m talking about is the state of my typical, usual days. They’re happy, positive…plain ol’ great days. Wondering how I do it?
First, you should know that it’s not by accident that I have good days the vast majority of the time. I plan to have good days, and I plan to feel great. The days are too precious to leave to chance. So I work at it. And it’s so worth the effort.
I’ve developed some daily practices that keep me on a positive track.
And those practices start the night before. Here are my top five practices for having a great day.
- The night before, calm the nervous system. Pay attention to how you spend the last few hours before going to bed. If scary, dramatic movies give you fitful sleep, avoid that sort of thing. Figure out what is calming to you and do that instead. A cup of soothing tea, walking the dog, a lighthearted show…
- Visualize the end of the coming day and feeling good about the day you just had. Visualize, in a soothing way, the projects, meetings, and conversations you’ll have in the coming day. Visualize what it will feel like to come home and relax after a productive day. Do you have a spiritual practice? If so, harness it during this time.
- Get plenty of sleep. Go to bed early and get seven to eight hours of sleep.
- Before you get out of bed in the morning, set your intentions for the day. Don’t get too granular here. Think big-picture intentions. This could involve meditation or a spiritual practice.
- Finally, throughout the day, set high expectations. Pause before you do the next thing and talk to your unconscious mind about the outcomes you want to have. When you get congruent, you’ll be amazed at the doors that open for you.
My clients and I have proven these techniques over and over again. They really make a difference! The quality of your days is too valuable to be left to chance.
Thanks for listening!
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Links from today’s episode:
- Episode 1 — We learned about the reticular activating system
- Episode 2 — We learned about internal representations and perception is projection
- Episode 4 — We learned about toward motivation
- Episode 32 — We learned about chunking
To help out the show:
Brenda: So when I go to places and I meet people, what happens often is that I’m asked — often — why I’m always in such a good mood. And now, there are moments — because I’m human, so obviously I have stuff that happens to me that takes me out of a good mood. Like I can tell you today I went into the kitchen that ask Ron for something, and I felt like he kind of snapped at me, and I got a little cranky. Now he says he was just talking in his focused voice, because he was focusing on preparing dinner, and I was a little hurt because that felt like reprimand and a little bit of voice raising. We don’t really raise our voices around here except when we’re laughing and having a good time. So for us to have an argument, that’s really rare. So I was thrown off by the voice.
So that happens. And then, of course, we talked about it for about 30 seconds, and then everything was well. So things like that happen to me. That’s pretty much how it goes for me on the regular.
And I’m genuinely a happy individual. I have been told that I’m intense when I’m doing my work. Hi, Mom. She would agree. And so I know that, like everybody else, I have stuff that I’m working on. I have goals. I have desires. I have wishes. I have things that I want to improve about myself, and I’m always focusing on making that happen so that I can be there for myself and my family and my clients and my students. And outside of that, life is pretty darn good.
And people ask me how…often. And I know when I go to a place to speak, the comments I receive and the feedback that I get is always so positive. I love that, and I appreciate it, and it truly touches my heart.
I’ve been told so very often that my energy is just very high, and I’ve got to say that I know that. I get that. And the reason that I know is because I know the opposite. I know when it wasn’t. And I’ve talked before about what I’ve gone through in order to get to this place. I think that people who get to a place where they’re teaching and they’re showing the way to others, I think that that usually comes as a result of going through some stuff that didn’t feel good. A lot.
I certainly have had that experience. I know people who are out there leading who have had similar experiences and even worse, and they’re been able to turn all of that around and create a space for people where they can come and heal. And not heal as in I’m healing anybody. I create a space for people so they can come into that space and they can do the work to heal themselves.
I think that that happens largely because I tend to my own world inside consistently. That’s what we’re going to talk about today.
Someone asked me what I did to stay like this…most of the time. And I’m pretty much like this all of the time. Very rarely does something really throw me off. There are times when I experience a little bit of frustration, and there are times when I experience some overwhelm. There are times when things are not moving fast enough for me. That’s just what happens. Those programs for me are running in the background of my personality. So they’re probably going to be around there for a while. And as time goes on, it just gets softer and softer and softer.
So I have high energy, and I am a positive individual, and I love people, and I love helping, and I love serving. And I also have boundaries and take care of myself. And I love my relationship, and I love my family. So it’s all really good. So how does it happen?
For me, it was having that breakthrough experience a couple of times. And then it became about these daily habits. And I’ve said this here so many times, and I talk to people often who’ve said, “Listen, I want to work with you, but it’s not in my budget right now. So I guess I’m just not going to have the benefits.”
And I say, “No, no, no. There are so many things that we can do. There are so many things that you can do without having to come to someone like me to help you through them.” And we’re going to talk about those today.
The reason that I created this podcast was to give people resources so they can begin to tap into the power that’s inside them, to all the resources that they have inside that are going to help them become the person that they know they are. Not maybe doing the things that they’re doing now.
I tell my clients and my students all the time that I operate under two premises in anything that I do. And that is that people are not their behaviors, and they’re all doing the best they can.
So how do we get you to have fantastic days just about every day? And this, like everything else we’ve done here about you creating a practice. And this is about mindful practice and creating the neurology around it, establishing the patterns, creating new neural track, new neural pathways that are going to support you in doing this on a day-to-day basis, because I am a firm believer that when you get to a place of congruence, meaning all systems are firing in the same direction, and everything is aligned in the direction of what you want, you’re going to find yourself in a place where there’s more choice for yourself. You’re going to find yourself in a place where you can tap into more of your creativity. You’re going to then be in a place where, because of that filtering system, because you are now creating this mindful practice of focusing energy in a positive direction, then your reticular activating is going to pay it back by creating a filter for that. And then your experience becomes about more positive experience. And that’s how it works. I am convinced.
There are five things — and there’s a lot more things — but there are five things. People ask me, “What are the things that you do?” And I’ve been asked that enough to where I thought that I needed to just create this episode, share the information with you. You do with it whatever you want. I’m thinking that it’s going to help some of you, and that’s really the purpose of this.
So my routine, my morning routine for the things that I do that help me and support me and making it a great day every dang day…
There are five things I do. I really thought about this. How many things do I really do to make sure that it’s a good day every day, that I feel good for the moment that I wake up, and that I feel good when I’m going to bed at night.
For me, it starts the day before. I learned this a long time ago when I was up till two and three in the morning consistently, and I had to write a journal about all the things that I was doing right before I went to bed. And then I realized that, for me, in order to have a really good day, I need to start the night before. Every single thing I’m going to share with you I have proved to myself over and over and over again. And my clients who are using this same system also have.
The first thing I do is I calm the nervous system before I go to bed. I’ll tell you a funny story.
Ron has been watching this show on TV. And I know I have a routine. We can watch a little TV. We watch very little television, but when we watch something, it’s usually, for me, a story that feels really good at the end. Even if there’s struggle, and I can watch really scary movies, and I can have fun with those — I just can’t watch those before I go to bed because then it affects my sleep. But I want to have a story where there’s happy endings. And I want to have some sort of redeeming quality to what I’m watching if we’re going to watch something in the evening before we go to bed.
So calming the nervous system, to me, is having some tea that’s going to be soothing to the nervous system. Sometimes it means listening to some soothing music. A lot of the times it’s reading a book. Some of the times it’s watching something on TV that feels good or is funny. If I think it’s funny, then I’m cool with it. It feels really good. People who know me know how much I love The Office. I am watching the whole thing about now for the fifth time, and I find it hilarious. So that’s the kind of stuff that I do.
Well, Ron, on the other hand, likes complexity of stories, and I have no idea why. But whatever. This is what he loves. So there we were watching a movie, and at the end of the movie… So it looks like there’s a redeeming quality throughout. There are people who have a purpose. They have a vision, and they’re moving forward, and yes, they’re struggling, and I’m really, really just tuned into the story and feeling so compelled. And I’m thinking this is so good. And at the end of the movie, everybody dies. Everybody. Everybody is dead.
And we go to sleep. And that is not a way to calm the nervous system. So I go to sleep, and then I have nightmares, and I literally wake up angry. So that’s how I know.
To him, it was just about watching the story, and he was good with the story, and he can separate himself from the story when the story is over. And he goes to sleep and sleeps soundly through the night.
That is not how I do things. My focus is very focused.
I know a lot of people love to watch stuff late in the evening, or they’re stuck on the YouTube or the social media, or they’re doing whatever other stuff they’re doing that’s shifting focus outwardly. So it’s really important there…
One of my favorite practices is to calm down and do things that are exclusively for me at night. That means I eat my meal earlier in the evening most of the time, and then I just relax with Ron. We take the dog for a walk, or we sit there and maybe watch something that we think is funny together, or we’ll watch something that I like that at the end is uplifting. I love watching nature shows. I am definitely one of those people that loves nature shows. That calms me down.
And then I get to the bedroom, and I turn on my salt lamp, so I keep a little bit of light in the room but not in the room. It’s in my bathroom. So just barely lighting the room. And I sit there, and I plan for my day the next day. And I don’t plan as in to-dos. I mentally, visually plan for a successful day. This is because I do I do Time Line Therapy® work. This is where I put a goal in the timeline for my day.
You don’t have to put a goal in my timeline. I have had successful days without putting a goal in the timeline. So what is it that you do? You simply visualize the day. This is what I do. I visualize the next night getting to bed and feeling really good about the day that I just had. And I plan for all the wins that I want to have. I plan for all the successes. I plan for the conversations that I’m going to have. I plan for how I’m going to feel throughout the day. I plan for having fun. I plan for enjoying that moment-to-moment experience. I plan for coming home and cuddling with Ron and the dad and just feeling so good. I plan on talking to my kids. I plan on having wonderful exchanges with my clients. It just feels good. And I just go on this visual of the next day’s activities.
It immediately changes how I feel. And I do that in a really soothing way. And this is where people have spiritual practice, this is where you can call on that spiritual help. I can tell you for sure that I do that. But I don’t feel that this is the place for me to talk about that, but just know that I have a spiritual practice, and this is where it happens for me, for the next day.
And then I plan to be asleep early. That was the toughest thing for me to learn when I began to make this life shift. I’m asleep usually by 10:00. Not even in bed but asleep. In bed by 9:30, 9:00. There have been times when Ron and I are in bed, and there’s still light outside, and it feels so good. And so I’m in bed usually by 9:30 and asleep by about 10 PM. And I get myself a full-on seven or eight hours of sleep.
And then I wake up, and as soon as I wake up… So that’s plenty of sleep — that’s number three. So as soon as I wake up in the morning, which is number four, then I set my intention for the day. And I set an intention. My intentions are… There’s an episode where we talk about chunking. And my intentions are high chunk. They’re not very specific. They are more in abstraction. And I just simply go big picture, and I talk about the beautiful day that I’m going to have, the wonderful exchanges that I’m going to have with my clients on the phone, on social media, the exchanges that I’m going to have with my team that are going to be really life-giving and exciting and fun. I talk about having fun, what I expect in terms of my day and the quality of my day throughout the day, and I set the intention for wellbeing and make it really focused.
Again, there is something that I have written down that I no longer read because I have memorized it, and I feel every piece of it. In this space is also where I bring in that spiritual part where I connect to that part of me that is spiritual, and I bring in that into this part. So that’s the fourth thing I do. And that intention part, by the way, is a daily, daily practice. All of this is daily except for maybe when Ron puts on those movies that I can’t stand. But even that, that’s okay because everything else is in place. So this is a daily practice.
I cannot tell you… I don’t even know what it’s like to get up and just get up and go. I just simply don’t do that anymore. I wake up early enough to lie in bed. And before my foot hits the floor to start my morning, I have laid out all my intentions for the day. That’s when I do it. I don’t stop. I don’t go anywhere else. I do breathing. I take my five or ten minutes and just simply set the intention. Depending on the day, I will meditate, just have absolute quiet and meditation during this time. I understand that people are busy. And I’ve got to tell you that I used to meditate for hours a day, and I don’t do that anymore.
Now my meditation practice is maybe 20 minutes. And I find that if I do everything else on my list, it is more than enough. So that is the fourth thing I do.
And if you ever want to get the list of the things that I do in terms of the actual words that I say, please feel free to reach out to me. And you know how to do it, and I’ll tell you at the end of the podcast. So you can reach out to me, and I will absolutely send it to you. This is not something that’s going to be a free resource on the site because it is very personal to me, and so I will absolutely share it, and then you can take it, model it, make it your own, and then begin doing it.
The fifth thing that I do that is part of my experience moment to moment — this is just what happens to me all day long — and that is to set high expectations. It’s not high expectations for how things are going to work out specifically. It is high expectations. I don’t go too specific. For me, it’s all about going big picture when I do this practice. For me, it’s more of a general theme. And that is my expectations for whatever meeting I’m going to have. So my expectations for meetings with other people who are not my clients, for meetings with my clients, for any type of other work, for me recording a podcast episode, for me sitting down with family, for me traveling in the car to get somewhere and arriving on time and arriving refreshed and feeling good, for me to find a good parking spot, if that’s what I want. I set those expectations nice and high. And I set those intentions before I embark on the thing that I’m about to do.
So if I know I’m about to do something, then I take literally one minute, and I put it out there. And I talk to my unconscious mind. And I say, “Unconscious mind, this is what I want. Let’s make this happen. And let’s make it happen.”
And if it’s a business transaction, then I always ask that the transaction is a win-win situation for both of us, that there’s a solution there that works for the person who wants to do business with me and me doing business with them, and that on the other side of it, we win in that everybody feels good and that we’re all connected to that purpose and that we’re focused on that and that it all just works out.
I do this with my meals. I do this with my evening experience. And this is how I live my day, moment to moment, focusing on feeling good. And I tell you guys all the time the importance of feeling good. And now you know how it works in my life. This is how I do it every day. Every day. And it just becomes this practice. So it’s a practice for me. This is what I do. This is my ritual.
What happens as a result of having this, the benefit to it… I’m telling you what to do, and I’m telling you, yes, you’re going to feel good. But the benefit of it really is that, as a result, you’re going to see doors opening for you that hadn’t been open before. You’re going to begin to shift the direction of the 50 to 60 bits.
And I think we talked before about if you right now are focusing on the… Let’s say that right this minute, your 50 to 60 bits are to your left, and this is what you’re focusing on. And maybe those 50 to 60 bits of information per second are creating internal representations that sometimes feel good and sometimes don’t. You’re just kind of letting life happen, and you’re almost a victim of circumstance. And a lot of times this is when people say, well, that person did it, and that person did it, and this person is that way, and if they could just do things differently, then I could actually feel better or do better, etc.
That’s about not having control. That’s essentially the at-effect conversation.
And then you start making this a practice and a habit. And then when happens as a result is that those 50 to 60 bits begin to change. And all of a sudden, maybe the 50 to 60 bits are not going to be so much on your left. They’re going to be a little bit towards the middle. And it’s going to feel good, and you’re going to feel a greater sense of control there. And you’re going to begin to see the evidence of the power of this practice in that moment-to-moment experience, in the things that you say to yourself, the way that you communicate with others, when you look in the mirror and you’re just checking yourself out and smiling and feeling good, when you’ll recognize that beauty is inside, and you walk around with that feeling all day long. And then all of a sudden, people tell you how gorgeous you are on the outside, and you’re like, “I didn’t do anything differently.”
Well, that’s what happens as a result of this work. So maybe then the 50 to 60 bits are now more towards the center, and then you’re going more of what feels good. Some stuff doesn’t feel good — we’re still human. We’re still having the experience — so you’re going to have some away-froms that are going to be taking place. And that’s okay as long as you begin to reframe and shift the direction of the away-froms to toward what you want. And then you’re going to practice this enough, and then, soon after, you’re going to find yourself to the right.
And the 50 to 60 bits that were on your left before are no longer part of the equation. So you’re now looking at this world through this lens that is cheery, and it’s uplifting, and you see people, and you see their greatness, and you see everything that they are. You only see the good things about them.
You’ll remember that perception is projection, and you thank your unconscious mind for reminding you of how good you’re doing, because if you see greatness in them, then that means that there’s greatness in you. And that’s how this works. This is way more powerful than simply saying “Just do something that feels good” in the morning. This is more powerful than simple meditation, although meditation is extremely powerful.
This is about you taking charge of where your focus is. And this is just another exercise in focus and you focusing energy. So I know that it’s powerful. It has served me greatly. And it continues to serve me every day.
That is all I have for you today. I hope that you found the information useful. This was a fun one for me. Super easy to do. It’s just the stuff that I do every day. If you have any questions about it, please go ahead and send us your feedback. Visit the podcast page at MindRevolutionPodcast.com. And you can send suggestions, questions in there. You’ll have access to the show notes. I’m going to ask you to please visit our free stuff section because there’s so many good worksheets there all based on the work that I do with my clients.
And also, we have that Mind Revolution Podcast community. So I’m going to ask you to join. We’re going to do stuff in there, and we’re doing stuff in there that’s more background stuff. There’s going to be things in this community that nobody is going to see except for the people in that community. So I would love it if you could join us in there. There’s going to be information on that on the Mind Revolution Podcast page. I’m also going to ask you to please rate and subscribe to our podcast. All of that helps us out so much. Everything that we’re doing, by the way, is based on your feedback. Everything. And I wouldn’t have it any other way.
Wishing you a wonderful time and beautiful days, every day, until next time.
I'm Brenda Terry. I'm a personal development trainer and master coach who works with go-getters like you who want to achieve big results in your business and personal life.
If you're excited and ready to play bigger in business and kill it in life, I help you identify and change beliefs, patterns, and behaviors that aren't supporting your goals so you can make more money, find more joy, better manage relationships, and communicate more effectively.
I'm here to help you make the powerful, effective shifts you're craving- faster than you ever thought possible.